Jun 262014

The Hammer PotD

As soon as I saw SheVibe’s Instagram video of The Hammer, I wanted it. I was stoked to find out that it was open to review. It has not left my side since I opened the package yesterday afternoon. I’m not kidding, I had it on my nightstand when I woke up this morning. I’m heading out of town today, and taking a hammer dildo isn’t in the cards, so I wanted to make sure I got to try this thing out before I left. I have been swinging it around since yesterday. When I knew that it was on its way, I psyched myself up by watching the movie, Thor. I honestly wish The Hammer flew to me the way it flew to Thor when he got his powers back. That would be epic (and highly improbable, unless someone threw it at me as hard as they could).

I’m looking forward to giving The Hammer a thorough workout, and am happy to add it to my collection. It looks amazing. I’m still in awe at how realistic the handle looks. They even made marks to look like real stitching. I realize that this translates as difficult to clean, but I don’t care. I have a toothbrush specifically for that reason.

The Hammer AaaAAaa PotD

 Thank you SheVibe for sending me The Hammer in exchange for my fair and honest review soon to come!


Jun 192014

My first wooden toy! I’ve been wanting to try wood for a long time now, and the time has finally come! When I saw the mail person at the mailbox, I tried to play it cool. I took the trash cans up, trying to keep my excitement contained (I seriously was afraid I’d tackle the poor guy in my need to see the Seduction in person).

When I got inside with my package from Burlesque Toys, I was surprised; I hadn’t heard much about NobEssence’s packaging before. It’s a nice, demure, sturdy box, that opens up from the top; I’ll be showing it in my review. Right after I held it in my hands for a moment (and did a dance), I ran outside to take a picture, and of course I had to see what it looked like wet. That’s what you see here; those aren’t imperfections in the wood or lacquer.

I can’t wait to try the Seduction. I’ll have to hurry and get some toy time in before family shows up. It never fails, whenever I get a toy that I’m eager to stick inside me, a big family get together is about to happen. Where there’s a will, there’s a way!

Thank you Burlesque Toys for sending me the Seduction in exchange for my fair and honest review soon to come!

Jun 172014

Amsterdam upward

It’s here! I am excited and giddy about the Amsterdam from Tantus. LOOK AT IT. It’s a colossus cock. I’m still in awe of how huge it is, in my hands. I was surprised that it made my huge boiling pot look like a pathetic little sauce pan. I’m looking forward to taking on the Amsterdam; I can’t wait to see how the “X’s” play out. Wish me luck!

Thank you Tantus, for sending me the Amsterdam in exchange for my fair and honest review, soon to come!

Amsterdam potd

Jun 132014

Pedro resized

The Pedro is here! As soon as I saw Pedro, I had to have it. It’s a rare dildo that can be left by a kitchen sink and nobody be the wiser. I’m excited to take Pedro on. This thing is HUGE, but so soft. It’s amazing that this dildo looks so realistic, yet is made of such soft silicone. This may be the one and only time, I will look down and see a terra cotta pot hanging out of my vagina. So, of course I’m excited as hell. This will be a very interesting experience.

Thank you, Primal Hardwere for sending it to me in exchange for my fair and honest review, soon to come!


May 222014

Alright, alright! I’m doing the blog tour! I’ve been asked by a variety of people to join in on the blog tour; such as Naughty Reenie, Red Hot Rosaline, and Kinky Biker Mom. The most recent, and the final straw that broke this camel’s back came from Vulgar Vag. Bear with me people, I’m a little rusty.

Tiana coffee

What am I working on?

That’s a pretty open ended question. I’m working on getting an education, masturbating, homework, masturbating, running a house hold, masturbating, going to the coast to help family, and reading about sex, sexuality, gender, and everything in between. Life has been pretty busy, as you can see from my lack of recent posts. Lately I’ve had a lot of family things (a death, a birth, birthday parties, baby shower, etc.), happen lately. So as the summer starts, I will be getting back to masturbating and writing about my experiences masturbating with different toys. I’ve really missed reviewing over the past several months.

T & Toys

How does my work differ from others in its genre?

Uhhhhh… The first thing I can think of is the pool. I use the pool in most of my toy shots. I love the way the water looks behind them. I think love is an understatement. I’m more or less obsessed with it. When I take my pics I’m lying on the cement, splashing the water to make ripples with whatever I have handy (pool noodle, kick board). What else? Um, my sense of humor? I really thought this Blog Tour would be easy, but I’m finding it’s not. There are a ton of cis women writing blogs about fucking themselves with toys. Seriously, what sets mine apart? Me. I do. I write it, nobody else. It’s all me. Keep in mind that I never said I was normal.

Goofing off

Why do I write what I do?

In the real world, a lot people aren’t open to talking about silicone being too girthy or too narrow for their vaginas or assholes. I like talking about this and other things. In the perfect world I could openly talk about my dildo collection, masturbating, or show off pictures of brightly colored cocks stuck to refrigerators. Alright, I do do that in the real world too. Though, I’m not really able to do it as openly as I do here. I like knowing that my reviews, storage tips, and pictures are enjoyable and helpful (at least I hope they are). I know that when I’m looking at a toy, I love reading a review that can tell me what’s wrong with it. Seriously, when I’m looking to buy something (think new printer), I’m looking at negative reviews. I like knowing that my review or pictures may answer questions someone might have.

Another reason is that I really enjoy talking about sex toys and sex. I’m actually going back to school to become a sex therapist and sex educator. That’s one of the reasons I’ve been so slow with posts. It’s not because I’ve lost interest or anything like that, but because I’m a full time student, among other things (such as a parent and spouse). Lately I’ve been turning class assignments into personal research. Most recently in English class, I was told to write an opinion paper on something for which I am passionate. While everyone else was picking Delta Smelt or politics, I chose to write about the sex education in California. I put a ton of time and energy into that paper. I loved it. I love the topic of sex and everything that surrounds it. That’s why I write what I do, and continue to research whatever I can. I absolutely love it. I think my aunt put it the best when she said, “When you talk about sex, you light up. This is what you need to be doing all of the time.”

t & m


From here I pass the Blog Tour Torch to Property of Potter.

Apr 032014

dvd stand newSAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURESA few months ago, I was searching craigslist for a small bookcase (I’m always looking for new storage), and I happened upon a DVD stand that met my needs. A couple of texts later and $10 to a person I’d never met before, and it was mine. It fits next to my book case perfectly and allows me to open and close my entertainment center without any problems. What I really love about it, is that I’m able to create shelve heights that meet my requirements. I’m able to fit odd sizes without any issues, and I was able to clear my bookcase of my books.

I love how simple finding storage on craigslist is. Nearly anything can be converted into toy storage, whether it be a dvd stand or a suitcase. When you put your mind to it, the possibilities are nearly endless.

One thing that I found to be useful was a tie hanger (or belts, or scarves). I’ve had this thing for years and have never had the heart to throw it out. I’ve used it for scarves, but it was never really effective, as I like my scarves extra long. It’s sad how long it took me to realize what it could be used for. I look at it ever day for years, and it finally hits me. Oh, well.

I know this is only effective for so long, as I’m always expanding my collection, but I will be able to hang future floggers and the like. In the mean time, I love how it looks, and having everything in one place. What really turned me on about it, was the fact that my Plunge Paddle fits perfectly onto the hook. It’s snug but it does fit, and that is what really sealed the deal, since the Plunge Paddle picks up lint like crazy.

dildo basket

dildo bags

Two things here, the basket and the bags. I found the basket at Target for 5 bucks, I think. I liked the design and the fact that I can use it on my bookcase, or in the shower. The bags I found in clearance at the drugstore around the corner. The bags are actually laundry bags that are machine washable and have no loose strings or lint. They came in three different sizes, but the smaller ones were more effective for my large dildos. I love being able to use bags that don’t leave lint on my toys, and don’t require me to struggle putting the toys into them. I do use plastic baggies for some of my toys, but I wish there were more options out there, like these bags.

I’m always on the hunt for new storage, and I do my best to share what I find. I hope that this helps you or someone find new, effective, low-cost, storage.

New Storage area

Jan 162014

GV SweatshirtRisa from Good Vibrations delivered!

Risa from GV had three hoodies to send out to the first people to respond to her tweet. I was fortunate that I was on Twitter at that exact time, and I had my laptop in front of me. I know if I was on my phone, I probably would have dropped the phone or sent a tweet that didn’t look anything like a spoken language.  I’m stoked to say that it fits and that I’ll be wearing it A LOT. To top it off? Risa also threw in a slew of Überlube samples.

Thank you Risa, and thank you Good Vibrations!

Überlube samples


Oct 072013


So many choices, so little time.

So many dildos, so few holes.

Suck it up. You’re a sex toy reviewer.

Try ’em all.


See who’s having fun this Toy with me Tuesday, by clicking the link below.

Toy with me Tuesday
See who else is having a Sultry Saturday, by clicking the link below.

Find out who’s else is having a Sinful Sunday, by clicking the link below.

Sinful Sunday

Sep 162013

PotD duke and salve

When Walter from Tantus asked me what I’d like to review, of course I wanted to try Duke in peacock coloring. I tried to play it cool in regards to stalking my mail lady. Listening for the engine of her little Jeep, rather than running to the window every hour. Usually I wait until I get inside the house to open my packages. I couldn’t wait this time, I cracked it open as I walked back to the house. I just had to see what the peacock looked like in person. I have to say I was not disappointed. It’s beautiful. It’s hard to see but there are swirls of color in the toy. It’s an iridescent blue green. Thing is gorgeous. While waiting for the water to boil, I took Duke outside to be photographed. When I was pulling it out of the box, I noticed that Walter had thrown in Shunga Erotic Art Sensations Balm. Who doesn’t love little extras?

Thanks Tantus for sending these to me, in exchange for the fair and honest review, soon to come…

PotD Duke

Sep 132013


I’ve been wanting to try a Divine Interventions toy for months now. When Nigel from Divine Interventions wrote me back I was on the edge of my seat. I told him that I’m not Catholic, but I’ve always had a love for screaming nuns. Nigel invited me to see the entire line at their booth at the Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco on Sept. 29th, but I won’t be able to make it this year (family reunion down in Santa Barbara). I love that Divine Interventions is located in the Bay Area. Hopefully I’ll be able to see their booth at another event soon. Perhaps Pride ’14?